How to NOT have an Eco-Friendly Kids Birthday Party

My son turned four this week. He also had his first haircut in all those four years (bring on the mom tears). I bought way too much plastic and packaging (bring on the environmental tears). And yet, his birthday week was an absolute success (one more tear for this mama’s joy).

I am not a perfect ‘zero waste’ parent and that is why I don’t ever officially call myself one. We try to live as low impact as we can and make small sustainable changes for our family as we grow and learn. There were A LOT of expectations for this birthday party. On myself, from dear old me of course. That may just be my unlearning from my own mother. I was going to make all the food, buy the right compostable plates and napkins. and be such a good ‘sustainable’ mother.

Yeah right.

There were plastic straws and Styrofoam airplanes and non-recyclable plates.

Insert lyrics to the famous Meryl Haggard song “Mama Tried”.

My son had the time of his life at the birthday party. He specifically asked for presents, balloons and silly hats just like a Thomas the Train book we have.

So, my husband and I did our best. Stuart, my husband, kept telling me not to worry or stress over this party…HA! This was my very first birthday party. A legitimate one that he would remember. I wanted it to hold my values and still be fun. Evidently, it met somewhere in the middle. Which was probably a good thing!

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Reality Vs Expectations

Of course, I’m still a ‘new mom’ so I should really give myself more grace. I really should. The reality of it is that I cannot afford to buy all the fancy party supplies that I wanted to get. There weren’t a lot of party items bought, but I certainly could have opted for more eco-friendly birthday party options. Such as paper balloons over the regular plastic. Some things just weren’t in the cards.

I go into more detail below as to what exactly I would have bought/did if we were in an ‘ideal’ situation. The truth is we are not, and such is life. My husband is switching jobs. I’m making .50 cents a month on this blog, and I was ridiculously stressed for no reason over this party.

Alas.

I took the convenient road. I did. The plastic pre-cut trays were purchased and the caramel-colored pretend dip. I want to say I’m ashamed, but that isn’t being very nice to myself. Is it?

I just know better. So, I feel as though I should do better. There will be other opportunities to choose the plastic free and sustainable option though. It’s okay mama, you’ll be fine.

And so, friends…

Here is how NOT throw an eco-friendly kids birthday party. Let my ‘blind consumerism’ be your environmental awareness.

What not to do:

• Buying the typical ‘party favors’. We got foam airplanes (by choice of my husband even though he knows I’m styro-phobic) and bubbles. Always a winner with kids and, darn it, if they didn’t LOVE those airplanes and bubbles though. Even kids not at the party were asking for some to play with. Opt for something non plastic or just don’t give party favors at all. Make some cupcakes and send everyone home with an extra one as their party favor.
• The prepackaged fruit/veggie trays. Yes, they were so easy, convenient, and delicious. However, those are sprayed with chemicals right before packaging to ensure shelf life and a whole other myriad of bad things that I never realized until reading this article.
• Party supplies in general. We bought walmart balloons, plates and napkins. Not a ton, but I still hurt inside when I stuffed all that plastic packaging into the trash as I cleaned up. DO you really need the supplies? You could easily spend the same on plastic plates from the local secondhand store and reuse those in the home. Or even if you find cool ones, send them home as the partty favors you didn’t buy. Cake and a plate. BOOM.
• The dreaded sugary kids drinks. We got horizon organic chocolate milks, elmo juices, a small pack of water bottles and la croix for the adults. All of which were a hit but there was straw packaging galore and very few things to be recycled. You could always ask everyone to brin their own water bottle to save you time and money.

What we got right:

• No gifts for him from friends. We politely put on the e-vites “Not need to bring presents, your presence is the gift!” Instead, we held back a few presents from family and also found REALLY COOL secondhand gifts like big legos, a model rocket set, and books from my favorite site, Thrift books.
• Homemade cupcakes with natural sugar and food dyed icing. I have a beautiful blue butterfly floral tea that I dyed the icing with. The consistency was terrible, but it tasted alright, and I am no Shaye Elliott. Baker I am not but honest I am. Good cupcakes + bad frosting = still all over the children’s faces and hands, so who cares about texture right?!
• Playground instead of indoors. No electricity was used in the making of this birthday party. We were all outdoors for two hours. It was perfect weather kind of day. Enough said!
• For the day of his actual birthday, we supported a local art studio and painted ceramics! We will see them again in 2-3 weeks 🙂 We did a walk to the playground on his bike and hung out as a family together.

An ideal eco-friendly birthday party

In a perfect world, this is what my eco-friendly toddler birthday party would look like.

Location: Still at the park. We would have walked towing a wagon of stuff and children. Maybe biking the children and pulling the wagon on the other bike. However, our bikes brake pads don’t work, we don’t have a kids tow trailer, and are currently saving for one. This one to be exact that I found secondhand for half the price, but we can afford to buy new if that one sells before we can snag it.

Food: Homemade cupcakes still with better frosting though. Maybe even a zucchini chocolate cupcake like Shaye, because that’s genius and why didn’t I think of it?! Another homemade veggie and fruit tray with a fancy wooden tray like this or a thrifted ceramic tray that I would bring out for other occasions. I’d ask everyone to bring their own water bottle and maybe make a fruit, herbal tea in a lovely pitcher like this one. That’d be it for food. If I bought chips and dip again, I’d find the Siete brand because they’re clean and delicious, and probably just make my own bean or french onion dip because it’s easy and yummy 🙂

Favors: If we still felt compelled to have favors, then I’d go with these wooden hand helicopters. They are so simple and a ton of fun for kids to fly! I’d buy paper lanterns then keep them hung in the kids room through the rest of the year. And I’d make sailor hats out of newspaper for the kids to wear. Maybe we could have even painted them with non toxic paints! Woo dream big mama!!

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At the end of the day, for us, it is about making memories and having fun. If I can be less wasteful along the way, great, grand. If not, at least I tried. I acknowledged my impact and can learn to do better in the future. My son is the celebration. Not the balloons or party favors. Not my husband or myself. It is about him being alive and well for four spectacular years. His beauty and growth is what I want to marvel at and revel in. I don’t want to sink into my pity and anxiety about not buying the biodegradable straws or recyclable wrapping paper.

In this spring season, I am keeping in mind what is important. Not beating myself up about the mistakes and actually putting into practice what I have learned the past four years.

I have learned that putting down my phone to play with my kids it’s better for the world than buying any number of over priced, green washed product.

The little drops of moments make up my ocean of joyful motherhood.

What’s your ideal birthday party for your little one?

In gratitude,

Tayler